"Why does this keep coming up? It's not like things are bad."
No, it's just that it doesn't feel like the inside of my head is getting any better, and it's been like that as long as I can remember. If you fail at something for years and years, don't you get to a point where you hate it and you want to quit, even if you're too damned stupid to?

Something kind of comforting about being awake in the middle of the night. I guess it's because no one's really expected to be sane or functional at four AM anyway.